Yeah and?

(no subject)

I solemnly swear that I am up to no good

In honour of the illustrious founders of this Lock, Gred and Forge Weasley, I hereby carry out our proud April 1 tradition and proclaim our annual message concerning the Lord Protector.

His Excellency the Excrescence
Lord Berkiness
First Knight of Knobheads
Prince of Pestilent Pillocks

Why yes! Our leader, the Lord Protector, is STILL a stupid PONCE!!!!

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Final announcements

Please remember to check your Common Rooms as well as your dorm rooms for personal belongings. Your prefects should have a lost and found table out in respective House Common Rooms.

Madam Pomfrey has informed me that there were a couple of students who failed to stop by the Hospital Wing to pick up any last doses of medicinal potions. She will be available during the breakfast hour in the Hospital Wing to pass them along to you to take home with you for the summer.

All trunks must be fully packed by 10:30 a.m. tomorrow morning so that they may be delivered to the station. This means everybody! Check in with your house prefects in the morning once your trunk is fully packed so your name may be checked off the list.

Siobhan Calderwood and I would particularly like to thank the students for their support in this, our last year at Hogwarts. It has been an honour for both of us to serve as your Head Boy and Head Girl. Good luck to you all this summer and for those returning next year, strive to do your best at your studies. We are proud of your part in continuing the rich traditions of Hogwarts, and we wish you the best in all your future endeavours.

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The Grim Truth was RIGHT!!!!

Back in February, the Grim Truth attempted to warn its readers of the extreme danger that the villainous AMYCUS CARROW presented to the innocent children of Hogwarts. Now we see the tragic results of the school administration and the regime's determination to callously ignore these warnings: one precious child has been ripped from life by a fiend not fit to kneel and kiss the hem of her robes.

Wake up, Wizarding World!!! More will suffer and die if you do not rise up and shake this tyrannous yoke from your shoulders.

AMYCUS CARROW deserves more than a slap on the wrist, a mere stint in Azkaban. He deserves no less than the Dementor's kiss, if not his head on a pike on the New London Bridge, displayed as a warning to all. The Grim Truth stands in solidarity with those mourning this child's sad death--and we will stand shoulder to shoulder with all right-thinking people who raise up their full-throated cry for JUSTICE!

May the memory of Hannah Abbott keep us strong, and let her death not be in vain!!

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(no subject)

I solemnly swear that I am up to no good

Yes, it's time once again for our annual message concerning the Lord Protector.

Marvellous Marvolo the Nihilistic Nincompoop
Lord Bunion
King of the Vom
His Flatulance

His Excellency, the Lord Protector, is STILL a stupid PONCE!!!!

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They're coming, and I may only have a little time.

Here is the grim truth, my friends. Here is the truly grim truth. No one our society deems worthy of magic can possibly be trusted with it. Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Want power of your own? You must TAKE IT!!

If you are a muggleborn wizard or witch, one of the despised and spat upon and enslaved and crushed and miserable, that same power that your oppressor has RESIDES IN YOU. They will never expect it, but if you seize their wands, if you turn their own weapons against them, you will be grasping the sword by the hilt and not the blade. That power will be YOURS and remember, they have to sleep sometime. Wait and watch and you will have your chance!! THEY know you can do it!! It's what they fear ABOVE ALL ELSE. You've seen the magic done, you've had it done UPON YOU. You know how it works, you know the gestures, you know the words, if it's been done to you you have every right to do it to them. EVERY right. Crucio. Imperio. Avada Kedavra. If you have the will, if you believe in your own rightness, you CAN use these weapons. Rise up, because together with the muggles we can destroy our oppressors. Tear down the walls, break the chains, you are powerful and strong and you CAN be free!!

If you are a muggle, you won't be able to use a wand but know THIS grim truth, wizards are human, they are mortal, they can be gutted like animals and they will die just as surely as animals, and they will always - always!! - underestimate the power of someone who lacks magic. Keep a sharp knife by you. Make sure it is SHARP!! Poisons are risky, wizards can cure poison but only if they know they've swallowed it, so if you use poison use something that kills swiftly and give it to them just before they're going to sleep. A wizard without his wand will panic, will think he's defenceless, will think



If you're not in the rehearsal hall RIGHT NOW, you're more than late.

We've only got three more rehearsals before hols, everyone. You need to be on time and ready to go when we start.

Anyone who's late on Sunday risks having their part reassigned.

(WEASLEY! That means you especially! You were supposed to be here TWENTY MINUTES ago!)


I speak to you today about serious matters. Our ruler styles himself our 'Protector,' and surely if anyone has a right to protection from him and from ALL of us, it is the children of our nation. Our wizarding children, our precious next generation! Listen, and you will hear their cries for succor, their demands for justice!

The Headmistress of Hogwarts School has shown callous disregard for the well-being -- nay, the VERY LIVES of our precious children! So-called professors AMYCUS AND ALECTO CARROW are notorious for their cruelty both in the classroom and anywhere they might be found, and yet MINERVA MCGONAGALL offers them both shelter and continued employment! I submit to you the following known incidents:

AMYCUS CARROW has routinely cast the cruciatus curse on defenseless first year students. In one case this was punishment for the 'crime' of expressing curiosity about the spell.

AMYCUS CARROW is a habitual drunkard and is known by all to be violent and dangerous when intoxicated, even threatening students on occasion with both wand and makeshift weapons. His drunkenness has repeatedly caused him to fail in his classroom duties. Not that he is any use as a teacher even when present. Since HEADMISTRESS MCGONAGALL is also a notorious and wayward drunk, perhaps it is the sort of friendship found at the bottom of a bottle of firewhiskey that has given CARROW his secure position?

AMYCUS CARROW has made cruel and malicious attacks on a student who arrived at Hogwarts after mistakenly being consigned for years to the mudblood camps. On one occasion he set the boy ablaze, causing both injury to multiple students and serious damage to Hogwarts Castle. As punishment for this wanton behaviour his own servant was reassigned -- AND YET HE CONTINUES TO TEACH. How much more, one wonders, will HEADMISTRESS MCGONAGALL accept?

BOTH CARROWS routinely use the cruciatus curse as a disciplinary measure for trivial misbehaviour.

BOTH CARROWS instruct students in the darkest of Dark Arts and encourage them to act on their basest and most PERVERSE instincts in dealing with their peers.

BOTH CARROWS are known to have used the Imperius Curse to force others into dark and horrifying acts -- some merely humiliating, others that would shock the conscience of all who knew.

BOTH CARROWS are known to have devoured the roast flesh of murdered muggle infants, after cutting out their hearts and kidneys to use in Dark potions.

AND FINALLY, ALECTO CARROW attacked one of the school governors with the cruciatus curse, doing him grievous injury to the point that he was seen requiring a cane for support days after the incident.

AMYCUS AND ALECTO CARROW are cruel and unstable maniacs and a COLLECTIVE MENACE to the Hogwarts students. If MINERVA MCGONAGALL will not act, we call on the school governors, even the so-called LORD PROTECTOR HIMSELF to immediately remove them both from Hogwarts so that they will no longer have any contact with children!

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I know I've said this before

and it is quite late, but PLEASE do not spread rumours about the school's Professors or distinguished members of the school's Board of Governors.

Perhaps some of you may not realise that our proximity to Dementors may have a pernicious effect on some susceptible people's judgement. But if you stop and think for a moment I'm sure you will realise what your Prefects have been trying to make clear all day:

NO ONE has died

NO ONE is under arrest

NO ONE has been sacked

The school, as always, is running like clockwork

The students can confidently depend upon their Professors and Prefects to maintain order, as Our Lord Protector expects.

For. Merlin's. Sake.

Go to bed, everyone.

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Attention students

It has come to the Prefects' attention that certain 'lists' with names of third year students are circulating for which 'votes' for various attributes are solicited.

Prefects have been notified to confiscate immediately all such lists that they see. Such shenanigans are not in keeping with the dignity expected from Hogwarts students, and this cattiness and back-biting is contrary to the values that our Lord Protector is attempting to inculcate in His subjects.

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